Sunday, June 12, 2011

Adopt New Norms For Better Interpersonal Communication

A norm is an expression of the way we do things around us. It’s what is commonly practiced in our work place. Traditional norms  are reflective of the culture of most of the organizations. They will not allow or produce remarkable group effectiveness or results. The new norms as listed below are fundamental to being a powerful group or organization.
Listening respectfully and generously:
Listening respectfully means paying attention and truly allowing people to finish their thinking and speaking. Listening generously means allowing people to express ideas and views different than our own without resisting their speaking either verbally or non-verbally. This new norm is to be replaced with the traditional " Preoccupied or pretending to listen, thinking we are getting away with it.'
Being honest, authentic and candid:
This means speaking honestly in a way that forwards the conversation. It means speaking as friends. It simply means speaking straight— saying what is so for us. It means not leaving a conversation with something still unsaid that needs to be said. This should be the substitution for the traditional Norm " Not speaking up when we have a concern."
Doing what you say you will do:
Exchanging and honoring specific commitments. This means respecting each other’s commitments and our own. If we are working to create new futures, we won’t always succeed in completing or achieving every commitment, but that does not mean we were inauthentic in committing. Exchanging commitments is how work gets done. This could be the replacement for "Keeping our word only when we feel like it or it’s convenient" which is a traditional norm.
Being on each other’s side:
This is being on each other’s side in the way that parents are on the side of their kids. It’s the way that great coaches relate to each and every person on their team. No matter what happens, we are for each other. A mistake is just a mistake and doesn’t lead to less trust or less relationship. The tratitional norm related to it is  "Concerned for ourselves."
Acknowledging and appreciating each other:
This means that each person commits to continuously acknowledging and appreciating the contribution of others and the group itself. This includes acknowledging each other when things don’t work out. This is above and beyond the simple courtesies that are also important. To be adopted in place of traditional norm "Not letting people know that we value and appreciate them".